Sample winning essay for Whales: Giants of the Deep Class of the Month Contest - Simon

Simon LeFrak Image

Simon's work comes from Victoria Berger's and Isabel Reyna-Torres' fifth grade class at P.S. 20 Anna Silver.


This essay’s strengths:

  • Defines adaptation and introduces the topic in the context of whales
  • Maintains focus throughout
  • Names three whale adaptations and describes how they are used
  • Uses accurate and relevant facts from contest readings and the “Whales: Giants of the Deep” exhibit to explain whale adaptations
  • Illustration depicts and labels the adaptations discussed in the essay

Needs additional support:

  • Writing with efficiency and concision
  • Defining “adaptation” more clearly
  • Paraphrasing textual information instead of quoting